Overcome Bullying

As many of you know, bullying is a very big problem in our world today. It goes from emotional bullying to verbal bullying and eventually physical bullying, as well as people who have got disabilities. Today however, now that everyone uses the Internet, it has come to a stage where people even cyberbully another person or a group of people. It is so sad that bullying is so violent and physical that it can lead to suicide for some people, especially children. I have done some research and have found out children who are in elementary school get bullied the most, basically bullying occurs as children are growing up.

Bullies have an aggressive behavior that involves an imbalance of power and strength and it is typically repeated over and over again. Many people who are being bullied don’t tell their teacher’s or parents about them being bullied because usually, the bully threatens them not to tell or that bully will beat them up etc. Bullies will even bring up an event that you were embarrassed about, just to shame you. I am going to tell you how I was bullied since elementary school until I matriculated. During my school years, I have been used, ordered around, name called, blamed at, blocked out of groups, judged and I have been threatened.

An illustration of someone being name called

Over the years I have been at school, I have been bullied, more verbal than any physical bullying. It all started when I was moved to another school. It was my second year at this school. I was name called several times and it was very hurtful to me. I ignored the name calling as it didn't go on for too long. As the years progressed in my junior school years, when I was around my “friends”, they ran away from me and didn't want me in their group of friends. I was even being isolated from groups. I remember one day I just bought a packet of sweets to school and these two girls just kept on asking for more of these sweets, and were suddenly nice to me. I knew something wasn't right, but I brushed it off and carried on giving out the sweets. One day, it was during the time my grade had physical education, which we played soccer. It was really fun, our coach even joined in and helped my team and at the end my team won. My team and I were happily speaking to each other…but…all of  a sudden…a girl from the other team came up to us and said “Just to let you girls know, she cannot be trusted” and was pointing directly as me. The girl walked away and we were all confused as to why this girl would say something like that. A couple of girls and I walked to a staircase and were talking, when suddenly the other team of girls walked up to us and said that I cannot be trusted, I am a liar and I am a backstabber.  I turned around and walked away,but in the process I was being teased and picked on. After this day, not much happened. Now we go back to my high school years…

To start off with in my high school years would be in the very 1^st term in high school, we were allowed to select a class captain. I was the one chosen to be class captain and I was very happy because I thought my class respected me…but, it wasn't because they respected me. The consequences of being a class captain is if the class captain couldn't control the class and didn't assign to their duty, they would get afternoon detention. Little did I know my class only chose me so they can get me into trouble, this I only found out towards the end of my first year at high school.

This must have been one of the top 3 most hurtful bullying incidents I have ever come across. I can still even picture this scene in my mind. I was in math class, happily doing my work, until the teacher walked out to go somewhere…Right at the corner of my eye, I saw one boy standing there. I was suspicious, but let it brush off. Suddenly, the boy took my head and put it between his legs (No nudity here, we were all in school clothes) and everybody ended up laughing at me. I was crying inside because it was even being recorded by the boy’s phone. He asked how I spell my name and the girl told him how my name is spelt and I told them to please not tell my name, but they ignored me. When the teacher came in, I didn't say a word to her as I was afraid of losing any “friends” I had. I was humiliated as the other classes in my grade found out and laughed at me. I was walking home, crying to myself until I eventually was at home. When I entered my house, my mother knew immediately that something was wrong and I told her everything that happened at school and she was very upset, so she phoned my school the very next day.

The next day came, it was nearly break when the principal and vice principal came to my class and searched us to see if we had our phones on us. The vice principal found 2 – 3 phones amongst us, one of which were one of the girls. When break was over, word got around and there were stories saying I told on or something like that and I said my mother phoned the school. No one spoke to me…until I wrote a letter for my mother stating how I felt and what everyone was treating me like. One of the girls came up to me and told me not to worry what other girls are saying and was been incredibly kind to me. I then tore up the letter and told the girl I threw my torn up letter in the bin. She immediately walked up to the other girls and told them I threw the letter away, and I knew instantly the girl was just faking everything. What was very shocking is what came afterwards…the girls actually took the bin and pulled out every single piece from the letter I tore up, taped the pieces of paper together and they read the letter aloud and started to tease me. There was a teacher in the class, but he did not do anything about it. At the end of the day, the entire high school went to the school hall for an end of the day assembly. I was the first person in my class to sit in our class row, but no one in my class wanted to sit next to me. Eventually they had to move down the row as we needed to fill up all the chairs. Two teachers’ called me aside, asking why I don’t look happy and why no one was wanting to sit next to me. I told them everything that had happened in the past two days and one teacher told me not to worry about it and that it will all be resolved the next day.

Friday came and on this day however, during the morning time, my mother told me to ignore the girls and to continue my school day. I did just that, I walked past the girls, they asked me why I am a “tittle-tailor” and haven’t my parents taught me manners to answer a question when someone asks me. I ignored them. It was 1^st period and I was told to go to my grade head and tell her what had happened. As I walked back to my classroom, I could hear arguing. I opened the door and saw the girls give a look of disgust, but one teacher quickly rushed out and told me to wait in the library as she wouldn't want me to be in the classroom at this point in time. When I could go back to my classroom, my entire class was quiet and did not say a word. Break time came and most of the girls apologized for how they have been treating me, but the only problem with their apology is some of them didn't mean it; some were smiling when they apologized. I was still being teased about this event as the people in my class never let go of what happened to me and they brought it up in every slightest chance they had just to shame me.

Two illustrations of one being verbal abuse and another showing to stop bullying

These girls really bullied me, and it may have not been physical, but it was definitely verbal. I was being bullied so much in my class that I ended up moving classes the very next year. When I moved to another class, my own class cheered for joy and were very happy I was leaving the class. I heard them whistling and screaming “YAY!” at the top of their lungs. This really hurt me, to think they only used me to copy my homework and I meant nothing to them. When I was moved to the other class, my friend from kindergarten came to my school and was in the same class as me. Sure she came, but I was being name called again. I can remember these two girls who would ask for money from people and promise to give it back, but never did. They even took people’s food and would threaten them. One morning, the one girl put her fingers on my lips and made my lips look like fish lips. (Since elementary school, I have been teased about my lips.)I gently pulled the girl’s arm away as I did not like what she was doing and she immediately turned around, punched me extremely hard on my arm and threatened me. This girl was actually kind to people, but became very rude when she was around her friends.

As my high school years progressed, not much bullying really happened as I started to stay in the library most of the time to either study or read. I was still chosen last in every sport activity I was in. Whenever I was wide open to score a goal and asked if I could get the ball past on to me, no one ever listened and even though I was on their team, I was always ignored. When we had to do group work for any class activity, no one picked me to be in their group, so I ended up working by myself.

In the year 2010, our school was moving to another area, which was quite exciting, but I still missed my old school building. I remember when we moved to the new school building, I did not speak to anyone. The truth is, I didn't speak because I have been verbally bullied so much and I thought if I didn't say anything, then nothing would happen to me. My excuse to everyone was that I was in a new environment and I was still trying to get used to it. When I arrived on the first day I went to my new school building, I was quiet; no words came out of my mouth. To my surprise, the people in my grade actually asked if I was alright and I never spoke to anyone. I didn't answer any of them; I just looked at them and nodded or shook my head to answer their questions. I couldn't believe they actually cared!

About 3 months after we settled in our new school building, I started to talk again to people as some teachers were concerned about me.

During the 3^rd term, since there were not enough learners in the grade higher than me to become Prefects, my grade was also chosen to apply. I applied and really wanted to be a Prefect, I was coached by a current Prefect. A couple of people were chosen to be a Prefect, but we all first went on a trial so learners could choose which learners they wanted as a Prefect. It was really nice and I was enjoying being on trial, but the one grade higher than me who also applied to be a Prefect was being nasty to me. In one assembly, one girl in my grade was talking; I turned around and said something to her and the trial Prefect told me to be quiet, but never told the other girl to be quiet. They actually ended up having a full-on conversation instead.

One day, I wasn't on duty and sat with my grade. The Prefects on trial told me I wasn't wearing the correct color clip and I need to watch my attitude towards them. These words were coming from one girl who was wearing heavy foundation and visible eye liner, while the other girl had the wrong color hair piece in her hair and the other girl threatening me. They still wanted to correct me for my appearance before they looked at themselves first. The next day I reported this to the teacher who was in charge of all the trial Prefects as well as the current Prefects, and he laughed it off and told me not to worry about girls who are corrected me for my appearance.

An illustration showing a girl being verbally bullied

In the year 2011, there was only one big incident I can remember that left me in tears. One Friday, my grade was meant to help out with some soccer match, but I couldn't stay, so a couple of girls did. Monday came, only to find out the two groups of girls in my grade were angry with each other. Curiously, I asked what the issue was. The one group said the other group weren't listening to them and were rude on the previous Friday. It was between about 3 – 4 girls who attended on Friday, so the rest got involved.  I made a huge mistake as I got myself involved and became the “in-betweener” and told each group what the one was saying to the other group. This fighting between the two groups went on for a full week, but on the Thursday, I sat in my Design class as I wanted to get my work done. The one group that was sitting with me in my Design class were complaining about the other group. I told both groups to please stop fighting, but none of them listened to me. Later this day, both groups found out I was telling each group what the one was saying about the other. At the end of the day, two girls literally ran up to me and started to threaten me and left me in tears. The one group of girls told me it’ll be ok and they aren't angry with me. Even though I was guilty for telling each group what they were saying about each other, the one group was able to forgive me. Friday came and all the girls in my grade were called to a meeting with our grade head. It left 5 girls crying, one girl who wasn't involved in this situation and me saying on Thursday I got a text that said the one group is happy I am not their friend anymore and I am worthless to them. This girl who got herself involved called me a person who wants all the attention. This girl in fact, was an attention seeker herself by spreading rumors about herself that could not possibly be true. It was strange no one was upset with her, only with me.

In the year 2012, my final year in school, there may have been not much of me being bullied, but there was a presentation about bullying. The now Prefects who were in my grade spoke about bullying and why it’s not right to bully. This speech/presentation was coming from girls who were bullies themselves. I couldn't believe what I was hearing and seeing, it made me upset that hypocrites are speaking about bullying. When I heard the Prefects will be speaking about bullying, I asked my grade head if I could speak about bullying from experience, but she declined and said Prefects have to speak. This made me even more upset as the presentation needed people to speak from experience.

As my last year in school went on, no one in my grade were really bullying me anymore, I think they actually grew up, realizing what they had done and just became more matured.

An illustration showing what type of bullies there are

This is how I was bullied and I would like to encourage people to stop bullying because it is not necessary to be rude and cruel to other people who have done absolutely nothing towards you. I also want to encourage people to overcome being bullied. You just have to stand up for yourself and be strong. I know this is weird, but when I was listening to my own music, it helped me and made me happier when I was at school with people who bullied me. I had and still do have the best parent in the whole wide world who would listen to all my 12 years of being bullied, my mother.

It is very sad to go to school and know your lunch or money will be taken away by someone threatening or physically bullying you. I have even considered committing suicide at some stage in my school life because I couldn't handle being bullied, but I found talking to a psychologist and also speaking to my only parent and step parent who listened to me was much better than ending my life for a bunch of bullies. I know you have heard and seen so many school presentations or any presentations concerning bullying, but do you think the bullies listen to these presentations? They will keep on bullying people until YOU show the bullies how strong and positive you are. Show them you don’t care what they do to you or say to you, because you have a more positive outlook in life. Don’t ever give into peer pressure or do things you don’t want to get involved in. Think about positive thoughts and stay strong! YOU are what YOU believe YOU are!

I thank you all for taking the time to read my blog,
It is much appreciated!